Last weekend Ted and I camped out at the end of an old logging road, on the shores of a little mountain lake. We explored the lake in my kayak, fished a little, and watched the sunset. We cooked over the fire and enjoyed the mesmerizing flames deep into the night. In the morning we played in the lake and laid in the sun to dry. We picked dandelions to make tea, watched butterflies, and we lazed late into the afternoon before returning home. Time disappeared and we both felt the magical peace of the lake and the sun.
My favorite line from the trip came from Ted at breakfast. He sipped his tea and leaned back in his chair, and said as he smiled from ear to ear “this is amazing, I feel like I am eight years old! The coolest part is, I can drive and I have money!”
When the two of us are out on our weekend adventures we are both eight year olds. He is solidly in his little boy energy and I am solidly in my little tom girl energy, by design. We left our adult selves at home and took off, taking our two inner kids on an adventure. It is in the recognition of the kids within us that we match our energy and we are at our best.
Both Ted and I have enjoyed discovering these balanced happy little kids within. As our relationship has developed, we have done the work on identifying what persona’s we take on when we are out of balance, and when we are in balance. And we have learned tools to keep ourselves in balance as much as possible.
Let me explain. For me, when I am in my head, trying to do a lot of things, make a lot of things happen, and trying to control more and more, I hold the energy of an out of balance adult male. My energy is focused on pushing, accomplishing, and efforting. These are old behaviors of mine and as I recognize them, I have the choice of shifting into seeing the world through the eyes of a child, the eyes of a little girl. When I am there I soften, and become more inclined to watch and see what happens. I become more curious. I allow life so much more. And I am more playful.
There is a way to decipher what kind of persona we take on when we are in and out of balance. We can choose to be an adult, a parent, or a child, male or female. Each has their own ways of acting out and seeing things. Exploring this is a great tool for catching ourselves and redirecting ourselves back into balance. Sharing this information with the ones you love provides a playful way of meeting in our balanced states of being and creating more joy in our relationships.
For Ted and I, we know when Teddy and Niecie get together, we are kind and patient with each other, and there is going to be fun and adventure!
Life is an ongoing adventure!